In her new book, ‘True Love,’ which hits shelves November 4, singer Jennifer Lopez makes some surprising admissions, including that she’s felt abused in some of her past relationships.
In an excerpt from the memoir, via People magazine, Lopez says: “I’ve never gotten a black eye or a busted lip, but I’ve felt abused in one way or another: mentally, emotionally, verbally.” She names no names, but has characterized her relationship with ex-husband Marc Anthony as “very Sonny and Cher after the divorce.”
The book took on a life of its own says the American Idol judge, telling People: “It started out as fan book, a diary of the years I went on tour. But it turned into something else. As I started looking at things, it helped me face a lot. I would never go into specifics about my relationships, and I don’t. But the idea was that I learned something.”
In addition to describing her 2011 split from the father of the couple’s 6-year-old twins, the 45-year-old A-lister, who has been married three times, delves into the ups and downs of her love life, saying she’s learned a lot: “I know what it feels like for your soul to be diminished by the way your loved one is treating you.”
She says it took her years to learn that abusive relationships are the responsibility of both partners, writing: “Because every day that you don’t walk out that door, every day you accept things in your partner and in yourself, is a day that you’re saying it’s okay.”
The actress told People: “I had to learn to take care of myself and know my worth. When things are not working out, and you’re not being treated in a way that you want to be treated, you have to look at that because it’s nobody’s fault but yours. You have to take control and you have to set up your own boundaries. You have the power to change it.”
While Anthony is said to be supportive of the tell-all, no word from the other ex-boyfriends and husbands including Diddy, Casper Smart, Ojani Noa, Chris Judd, and Ben Affleck. Lopez now knows what she wants in a partner, saying in her book: “Keep the diamond rings, the Bentleys, the doves, the trips to Europe … Keep all of it! I can buy all of those things myself. Give me your time, your honesty, your respect, kindness, patience, fidelity. Give me comfort when things are tough.”